Author Topic: When a parent is not your parent  (Read 777 times)

Offline Stacy

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When a parent is not your parent
« on: January 15, 2018, 10:02:27 AM »
Forum:

Some comments and incidents have been coming back to me causing me to seriously wonder if my (estranged and deceased) father was really my father, my biological father.

I have Sun sq Neptune cj ASC from the 12th to signify my father--definitely his problem with drinking. Could Neptune hitting the Asc. (being born) suggest lack of clarity/sureness as to who a parent is, in this case it's my father?

Personally, I think a parent is who raised you and who you consider
your parent to be. Times have changed and the stigma is no longer what it was. But that's now days. The past is still under lock & key, at least in my family.

thanks,
Stacy
« Last Edit: January 15, 2018, 10:04:19 AM by Stacy »
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline Hudson Valley Astrologer

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #1 on: January 15, 2018, 10:36:19 AM »
Stacey,

There is a fascinating study in the Astrology of Intimacy, Sexuality and Relationship. Chart 19 on page 120 delineates "Violet."

Violet is said to have claimed that she was really the daughter of an older sister, "impregnated by her father." Interestingly, Noel then writes, "It is valid here to suggest that Violet was doing away with her mother so that she could have her father to herself."

Great book....

HVA

Offline Stacy

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #2 on: January 15, 2018, 03:48:53 PM »
Tim,

I did own that book many years ago when I still had a vast astrological library.  Not remembering this particular example, but in my case my mother is a certainty, just just questions about my father thru the years, and then with the placement I have...Well, it's possible my mother had a temporary bf during the many spllts between my father and her.  I won't go into the deep, dark and somewhat depressing reasons why this thought has reared it's head again (that's Pluto's realm), and I guess it wouldn't change anything. Except maybe answer some other questions for me.

thanks,
Stacy
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline Stacy

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #3 on: January 15, 2018, 08:56:59 PM »
Barring strong denials from my sister--who knows all the family secrets--I think I have a pretty good idea that my father is not my biological father:  Ruler of my 5th (Neptune) in the 12 th house of loss/strangers----and that Neptune is square my Sun
 (father)
.

And possibly Mercury ruling my 8th square Neptune-Asc. cj SN could be an influence. My mother has N Saturn-Jupiter in h. 5 with a 12 house Moon; she never knew her father. Lightening might be striking twice here. My dad has N Neptune in h. 5.  It's very possible.

Seriously, this calls for a question to my psychic-medium. I don't doubt her accuracy, but from what I have learned about psychic readings and such, they are not always given info. that we cannot handle or would be otherwise detrimental.

I guess it really doesn't matter much, aside from being a shock. It really would explain a lot, though. And I guess I would be sad  :'(.

Stacy

*******************************************************************
EXCERPT FROM AN ARTICLE ATTACHED
Mercury is often linked in Jyotish for adoption process .

In the Vishnu Purana and other Puranas, a story is told of the seduction of Brahaspati's (Jupiter's) wife Tara by the Moon - and Buddha is born from her.

He is called Saumya (????? ), that is, "Son of Soma [??? - Moon]." From Buddha springs the lunar race. The Moon, being his father, is friendly toward him, but Mercury knows that he is son of the wife of Jupiter and so he is in conflict with the Moon, who seduced his mother. That is why , Mercury hates Moon . Logically it means , intelligence ( ?????? -Mercury ) is the child of wisdom ( Jupiter) and intelligence ( Mercury) is always in conflict with emotions ( Moon) . In this story Mercury becomes adopted child of Jupiter .

Mercury is considered a child like , neutral gender, asexual planet , hence when it affects 5H of children through 12H or 8H , person ( mother or father )can become childless / impotent / sterile and that also hints for adoption .

Other combinations like 5th lord planet going to 12th House of loss/ strangers / unrelated people or reverse of that ( 12th House lord in 5th House ) can also facilitate same situation . Association of Rahu to 5th house means that one will be better with other’s child instead of having own biological children , which may prove problematic in future

Just keep building up on the situation and you would come by the planetary positions that are required. Then, you can verify them in a few cases to check whether they work. Any theory built up on sound reasoning will always be true. So instead of telling you the planetary positions, I would try and make you understand the reasoning behind it. A rule is only limited to one or two cases. You cannot have a 1000 rule each for every issue you want to check. But you can develop a common understanding based on which you can judge a horoscope without rules.

At first, let us understand the process of adoption and how it happens. Then, we can build an astrological understanding of it.

For a child, adoption means the loss of parents and also the gain of parents. When being adopted, it either means that his/her parents have abandoned the child or are no more. Yet, the child gets two other parents who are no less than mother and father.

For a parent, adoption is two things. Firstly, not having enough children of your own. Secondly, adopting a child who isn’t your own. Now, this can happen in several ways. Maybe child-birth is not possible or very complicated for the couple. Or maybe they just want to adopt a child to give home to some helpless kid. Or maybe, it is a single father or mother who does not want a relationship but wants a child.

So, based on this understanding, let us see what can possibly cause adoption.

If one of the 5th house and 5th lord is heavily afflicted, but the other is strong; it is indicative of adoption. Especially when 5th house is damaged but 5th lord becomes strong. It will not let the person have a denial of children.
If the 7th house is heavily afflicted for both the couple but the 5th is strong, it indicates adoption.
For a child, if out of Sun/Moon or 4th/9th are very weak but again get either of the two is strong or their lords are strong, it indicates adoption.
Mercury’s involvement indicates adoption, provided it forms a relationship with Jupiter.
A change is mahadasha and a very strong 5th house from mahadasha lord is a clear indicator of adoption. It is essential to analyse a horoscope from mahadasha lords as well. If at birth, a child’s 4th and 9th houses were weak but the very same houses from the next mahadasha lord are very strong, he will definitely get adopted after being an orphan.
Retrograde Jupiter or Mercury etc in 5th house are indicative of adoption. Such people will even make a mind from early years about adopting a child.
An exchange involving the relevant houses that alters the strength of the house is also strongly indicative of adoption.
Other than this, there are other cases too where other rules also become crucial. Those are:

In case of denial of children, your lineage and herdity stops. Someone else’s family is being propagated in your home but your own blood does not exist in the next generation. In such a case, afflication of 2nd house is a must. An afflicted 2nd house with a strong 5th house means adoption of children after denial.
There are communities where adoption is a part of culture. Like for example, in some marwari communities, you give away your children to your relatives so that you only have one heir to your property and the wealth of the family does not get divided. Or in some other cases like royal families, you need a male offspring so that he can take the position of head of the family. There, simply a strong 9th house is enough to facilitate adoption. In case of male child, if the 5th has feminine influences but the 9th is strong; adoption of a male child is sure.
Coming to your questions the 5th house is associated or aspected by malefic planets and when it's Lord Saturn or Mercury is combined. Mercury also plays an very important role and is responsible for this yoga.

There are many aspects by which it is to be analyzed. Main planets Saturn, Rahu associated with Mercury, 5th, 12th house plays important role.


« Last Edit: January 15, 2018, 09:09:59 PM by Stacy »
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline James Williams

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #4 on: January 16, 2018, 01:55:12 AM »
Stacy, who wrote the Jyotisha article?
"Time is a trick, a vast illusion...Yet there is a plan behind appearances that does not change. The script is written. For we but see the journey from the point at which it ended, looking back on it, imagining we make it once again; reviewing mentally what has gone by"  (Jesus).

Offline Stacy

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #5 on: January 16, 2018, 03:52:36 AM »
Sorry James--I deleted author's name along with part of article.  Let me look for it later today.  thanx, Stacy
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline Hudson Valley Astrologer

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2018, 04:23:53 AM »
Stacy,

"I guess it wouldn't change anything. Except maybe answer some other questions for me." Your description of your father certainly fits your chart. The parental axis appears to be under tremendous tension; very difficult circumstances are suggested here  :'(.

But you know, I like this inquiry because at some point if we are lucky we look at our parents and gain much needed perspective about ourselves. We get, as Noel likes to put it, caught up in our parent's traffic patterns. And yes there is an extraordinary amount of stress there in your chart with quindeciles to the MC and the Nodes, as you say Neptune clouding matters up, veiling and fogging up the mirror of your identity, you know? But not just obfuscating things, confusing matters, but stealing a dream, robbing you of a romantic version of what you might once have held dear about yourself.

But what really jumps out at me is the retrograde motion of the ruler of the ascendant. There is suggested here confusion within identity formation and Pluto itself occupies the 10th house along with the ruler of the 4th house. Whether your "father figure" or your "mother figure" were biological or not, doesn't change anything indeed because your chart suggests an "estrangement" as you say from the start. The emotional distancing between the little girl and her parents, whoever or wherever they might be, was too great. I get the picture (to borrow a Huber idea) of a little girl lost at the train station, missing her train. Like Grand Central Station its very crowded and loud but she feels lost and alone, and she feels even more lost and alone the crowder and louder it gets. For all the people in her life they just go whizzing by, spinning her around there in the middle of Grand Central staring up at the ceiling. And that's when she notices the connection! For all the daily commuters that pass underneath the celestial ceiling few ever notice their connection to the stars or each other. But the little girl knew... she was/is connected.

In time the bustling at the station slowed. A new train arrived and she got on board. She's headed due north. She rode in a comfortable booth with a view. Passengers came by and smiled. Some sat and visited for a while and then made way for new visitors as the train pulled up to its scheduled stops. Some visitors disembarked. Some new passengers climbed aboard.

Along the way the little girl recalls the celestial ceiling. She can't get it out of her head. She recalled suddenly realizing how it all connects. How it isn't just this or that piece of star dust cluttering up the gears but that it all works together at once and for all. And just as suddenly her words matter and affect how others think because they sense her wise intent. And she remembers! It comes back to her again. She knows who she is...

All the best,

HVA

Offline Stacy

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2018, 11:42:22 AM »
Tim,

A truly inspiring essay, of sorts---a compassionate, creative Neptunian commentary on a Neptunian child and childhood.

Yes, each angle, each house cusp is under duress. My psychic-medium says I planned it that way (of course); chose to have a tough time of it and that I need to finish it and not 'check out early' which is always a temptation, frankly.  So, 12th house planets may signify our undoing, but also it shows our hidden strength.

Maybe I should let sleeping dogs lie; maybe I have the spiritual strength I need to finish this journey and just need to swim towards that elusive, fog-shrouded NN shore (focus focus focus). It seems I was told and it's been my experience that whatever [info.] we are supposed to know will come to us. So also faith-faith-faith.
All Neptunian themes.

I think the astrology supports the likelihood that the father who raised me is not my biological father.


Stacy
« Last Edit: January 17, 2018, 10:08:51 AM by Stacy »
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline Stacy

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #8 on: January 16, 2018, 01:56:51 PM »
What planetary positions indicate a child being adopted or a mother adopting a child?
3 Answers
Yash Shukla
Yash Shukla, studied Jyotish at Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan, New Delhi (2000)
Answered Apr 10, 2017

Here you go, James--author of the article whose excerpt I posted.
Stacy
"If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live."  MLK Jr.

Offline James Williams

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #9 on: January 16, 2018, 11:58:16 PM »
Thanks Stacy...will have to do some research on his methodology...
"Time is a trick, a vast illusion...Yet there is a plan behind appearances that does not change. The script is written. For we but see the journey from the point at which it ended, looking back on it, imagining we make it once again; reviewing mentally what has gone by"  (Jesus).

Offline In Stitches

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Re: When a parent is not your parent
« Reply #10 on: January 20, 2018, 04:50:42 PM »
I read for a man a while back. He had Saturn exactly conjunct his 8th house cusp so I asked about his Father. He said he was told his step-father was not his real father until he was much older. He said he had always suspected it (8th house?). I guess I just wanted to know if his real father had been murdered (8th house).

I think that Karl Rove, Bush's advisor was told his step-father was his real/bio Father. I suspect that this was probably common before birth control, etc.