Creative Connections & Client Communications
Counseling Insights for July 31Polished Communications
There is no astrology without an astrologer. Cosmic conditions within time require interpretation and application. The astrologer is the agent who brings symbology and reality together within time, for learning and for understanding.
A few years ago, I had a client who was President of an Advertising Agency. Everything around him sparkled with creativity and style, but he voiced a curious diffidence about being intelligent. Over the last year or two, he had felt a nagging insecurity building within him during his all-important presentations.
In the course of the consultation, I asked him to tell me the most demoralizing thing anyone had ever said to him during his life. He replied not from his early years –he had shone so brightly in school, college, early business experience—but from the recent times in his marriage: he said, “My wife has just become so critical of me; I’m at fault for everything that goes wrong or has to be repaired, you know; I’m told how dumb I am because I can’t fix this or that, you know, real nagging about tiny stuff … and, yes, it's so demoralizing.”
Then I asked him what was the most significant, most exhilarating thing that had been said to him of late? He said, “Well, I was meeting with this woman, she’s president of one of my client corporations, and somehow in our talk I confided to her that I was ‘down’, that I didn’t think I had all the spark I used to have. She said to me, so reassuringly … just wiping away those gloomy thoughts, she said, 'All you have to do is open your mouth and say a few words and everyone in the room knows how bright you are! My goodness, that’s why we hired you!!!'” --How he communicated told the story of his intelligence and creativity.
So, what’s important here is that my client was having marital problems (and the horoscope showed it classically); and the diffidence was creeping into his sense of job performance. His client’s praise showed him the separation between home and job, and we could then get into some helpful, therapeutic details. –If he could assimilate one such crucial observation, he could assimilate the other!
Key for us in our discussion of “Polished Communications” here is that HIS communication style, HOW he spoke, showed how bright he was! Communication defines the person’s status, stance, and substance.
Our clients listen to us. Our clients evaluate us. –How do we measure up?
It is a sad, sad experience to listen carefully to the speech of today. Errors in grammar abound, as in “Her and me have gotta fix this up.” [She and I, of course] or “Just between you and I” …[you and me]. --The misuse of the verb “lay” is ubiquitous [you lie down; you lay something down]. It’s “As I said,” not “Like”. It’s “You know more about this than I,” not “me”. And the list goes on and on! We hear this even from newscasters; we see it in the local newspapers. –I mean, seriously now, do we realize that “You guys” is a flip, less-than-appropriate substitute for you-plural? And it is even being used in the singular, with one person??!! Is your wife a “guy”? Are Senators “guys” in government? Is your client, male or female, a “guys”?
When we don’t speak carelessly, we win points with everyone. Even with people who don’t know the difference, they HEAR a difference!. We are thought better of on our job. People listen up. We stand apart, and, with our image of professional astrologer at stake, this kind of shine is essential and highly valuable. We become wiser by being correct and polished.
Record your next consultation. –Do you like listening to YOU? How many “uhs” did you use throughout? How about errors in word choice, grammar? Is there a nervous laugh when you don’t know what to say? Was your client speaking with more style than you were? What improvements can you make … eventually to be more effective!?
As astrologers, we are dealing with lofty concerns: we are philosophers, psychotherapists, counselors all rolled into one! We must sound the part.
The sense of style and poise that we hear in the voice and in conversation translates as well into print. –Isn’t there something less than right about abbreviating the wonderful word “Sagittarius” (meaning wisdom) to “Sag” … or misspelling it as well, to “Sagg”? Isn’t there something less than right about not capitalizing the initial letters of the planets and the signs? Isn’t there something less than right about not editing a posting on the Discussion Forum of this website –not working for optimum clarity-- when you know it is being read by astrologers in twenty countries?
--Do I hear, “Oh, you’re just an old fogy! Get with it!”? --I hope not, and I so hope that no one is doing astrology (or eating dinner!) wearing a baseball cap put on backwards … Would one be coming or going?!
Let’s remember strongly: Astrology is the Astrologer.
Next update: August 31, 2003